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TooHip'isms

I won't even try to claim that all these apothegms are mine, but if you hang out with me long enough you're bound to hear one of them..


Experience
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
There are no problems... Only opportunities and challenges.

Kids
The trouble with having kids is that one is not enough, but two is WAY too many!
Too often we give children answers to remember rather than problems to solve.

Teaching
The best way to teach someone nothing is to try to teach them everything.
Want to learn something well? Try teaching it!

Unique
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
The secret of being a bore is to tell everything.

Lonely
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Friends
If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.

Principle
In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock.
Character is what you do when no one is looking.
I've never found an interesting person with a foul mouth.
Be like a duck. Above the surface remain calm and unruffled. Below the surface paddle like crazy!

Maturity
Maturity is that time of life when, if you had the time, you'd have the time of your life.
Age is a high price to pay for maturity.
The rate at which a person can mature is directly proportional to the embarrassment he can tolerate.

Judgement
Good judgement comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.
A bad decision is better than no decision at all.
Decisions are tools to remove confusion!

Life
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
Often in life we regret the things we didn't do more than the things we did.
The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children.
Love is blind... But marriage is a real eye opener!
For some, marriage is just a word. For others, it's a sentence.
Don't wake up at 65 and think about what you should have done with your life.

Skydiving
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is NOT for you.

Criticism
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely the one who dropped it.

Motivation
Want to help a pessimist? Give them a kick in the cants!
Motivation is simple. You eliminate those who aren't motivated.
Motivation is a fire from within. If someone else tries to light that fire under you, chances are it will burn very briefly.

Ability
Nobody can do everything, but everyone can do something.

Things I've learned from kids...
Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
You can't trust a dog to watch your food.
When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
Dogs don't like broccoli.
Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
When you hear the toilet flush and the words 'Uh-oh', it's already too late.
You should never ask your three-year-old brother to hold a tomato.
Superglue is forever.



More coming... Check back soon!

Last Updated03-05-2009
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