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Old Innocence - A new story of Laughter, Childhood, And Love.

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  #1  
Old 04-17-2006, 07:34 PM
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Wink Innocence - A new story of Laughter, Childhood, And Love.

Note: This is set on the london streets in the 1690's. Just to let yah know, because some things may seem unfaimiliar =). Also, I thought this Board would be more suitable for the story

The Tears Blinded Beth's Vision as she put down the old wooden box with a stone in her heart. The Moon was a penny, tossed high for heads and tails in the sky. Beth knew the time had come. Planting a kiss she hoped stay forever in her baby's heart, she left the carboard box by the road, and fell to the ground. At least she had given her baby girl a present so precious, a present that never dies. She gave her eternal love.

"Hah. Wouldn't dream o' it, would ya?," Don teased, nudging Pink.
"I would too! If you 'adn't given me that stoopid name, Pink or wotever, I would'a been the toughest gal in town," she replied smartly, giving Don a hateful look.
"'Ey, 'Ey now, Dont shoot me! Only tryna say, m'dear, that you cant dream 'o goin' out in the night with 'ol Don 'n 'is lot, wouldcha now, lil Pinky Doll?," He slyly said.
It was too much for Pink. She jumped out, her fists flailing like a horse on ice, and flew at Don. Screaming, she tugged his hair and smacked him hard on the cheek,
"Give ova, ya' crazy bull! Who showedcha the red sheet, then, sweetie?," Don smiled. Pink immediately simmered down. Angry or no Angry, the radiant beams that came from Don's Smiles couldn't be resisted.
Pink hugged him hard.
"Sowwy Don-Don. But, ya'know, your a lil' bit of a girl too. Y'aint that tuff, mistah. I saw'ya cryin' Yesteday, in yer room, Don. Why's dat?," She asked, her voice brimming with concern.
Don Looked away. Quickly he changed the subject.
"C'mon, now. Ill take ya down to the farm t'see the 'orses. Get'awf me knee know, 'n lets get goin'," he hastily said, tipping Pink of his lap and rushing out of the door.
"Wait!," Pink Yelled. Something wasn't quite right. Even a child like her, could guess that.

The farm was coated with thick, soggy, mud. Knee deep in dirt, Pink lifted her skirts up and ran along, tripping over in the mud and falling in face first.
"BwoarghhgrrAggh!," she shouted, trying hard to lift herself out of the mud. But all in vain.
Don hung about behind her, shaking with mirth.
"Sh'tup, misbarrrghhh!," Pink screamed, shaking her fist. She was sent flying into the mud once more.
This time, Don Flopped down beside her into the mud, rolling about and snorting with laughter.
"Y'look like on a me pigs, lad," came the voice.
Don immediately bolted up.
"M'sorry your highness," he said, grinning wide.
"Nah, no need t'be sorry, unless you carry awn like this, dear," came the cheerful voice.
"Uh, I got news for yer, 'Arrison. See that ol' lad, Fowler, right? Well, 'ee wonted a couple 'o 'undreds from yer. I know, thats an awful lawt, bu' wot can I do, eh? They'm all know you won down in the pub last night, don't dey? Means they'll be after yer like a bear goes after 'oney. Y'know dat, 'Arry?," Don shook his head sadly and climbed out of the mud.
Pink was getting restless. Desperately, she tried to catch Don's Eye, but he was too busy making eye contact with his best friend, his partner in crime. To Pink, they seemed to talk to with looks. Share huge secrets that she couldn't dream of with their eyes.
Suddenly, she jumped back towards Don. She seemed to scream silently. She so badly wanted to be part of the secret circle. Furiously, she lifted her vision up and stared ferociously at Harrison. The kind gleam he normally had had disapeared for ever. Instead, a look so cold and hard it made Pink shiver had replaced it.
She crawled closer to Don and hugged his arm. But he was as cold as the bitter morning winds of December.


To be continued later.

Anyone care to rate it? Not that good, I admit, I made it up on the spur of the moment. Yup, language MAY be hard to understand, but if you look closely, its easier =). I will be posting more paragraphs .


~ Straw

Last edited by StrawxBerrys; 04-17-2006 at 08:10 PM..
  #2  
Old 04-17-2006, 07:56 PM
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Oho! Another fan fiction! Lol, I'll read it more carefully a bit later, but so far it seems pretty good.

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  #3  
Old 04-17-2006, 08:05 PM
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Lol! Thanks =). Finally, someone (apart from me) reads my story. Guess I should just keep reading it over and over and over to make up for the times people missed it :P.

~ Straw
  #4  
Old 04-17-2006, 08:28 PM
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Muahaha.

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Its going good, heh, its kinda like Pirate talk the way you wrote it.
  #5  
Old 04-17-2006, 09:06 PM
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Smile Chapter Two

Lol, kinda, but thats the way they use to do talk back in the 1600/1700 in london, as far as I can recall. From Books of course! Im not THAT old! . Well, not the dukes and the ladies, just the street kids. Thanks for the comments though =).

The night drew an air of dark and dirty secrets, but Pink, being an innocent young child, was sheilded from the power of hatred, the sin of crime.
Smiling, she pulled her blanket up to her ears and chuckled, a merry sound that made the stars shine even brighter.
In the room next door, Don gathered together his things and gave one last look at the tumbledown shack him and Pink shared together.
Suddenly, guilt tickled and teased him, laughing mockingly when he collapsed on the bed, shaking with sobs. He couldn't do this. It happened every night. In the end, he'd be found. The triumphant gleam in the eyes of the police and the low voice of the Officer declaring: "Hah. You're Nabbed, Matey," rang as clear as a cuckoo's call in his mind.
He had to do it. It was now or never. Quickly, he threw his few belongings in the ragged bag, and slithered out, as silent as truth. Only the stars watched him leave the old cottage, only the moon saw how he ran after the gate. But, alas, there was nothing they could do. At that moment, a cloud covered the moon, and Don lost his way in the darkness of night.

Back at home, Pink tossed and turned in her sleep. Something was wrong. A tiny part of her heart had gone, a little light in her eyes. An uneasy feeling clouded over her, and she felt and urge to go and give Don an affectionate hug. There was nothing that couldn't cure for pink. She rushed into the room, a wide grin on her face. But all traces of happiness were wiped off the minute she saw how empty the room was. She searched his bed, his cupboard, even in the tiny mousehole, but nobody was there. The tears shamelessly dropped down her cheeks, and she rocked and rocked herself, sobbing uncontrollably, until she fell back onto the bed, Drowned with drowsiness.

When the morning came, it brought with it a new light for Pink. The sun peeked through the windows, giving a hearty good morning to the small girl.
"Don Don! Breakfast time!," she yelled, stamping her feet and pouting. That normally bought the lazy Don out of his room.
Suddenly, the events of last night rushed back to her head, like the wind screaming through the trees. She clutched her head in pain and yelled once more.
"Don! Yer didn't leave me, didcha? Doooooonnnn!!," She shrieked, running blindly towards the small, dirty kitchen.
But it only caused more heartache. This was a feeling Pink had only experienced once. She couldn't remember it, but long ago, a part of her had slowly rotted away. It was happening now. It was as if one by one, every part of her was ebbing away, slowly but painfully. Don wouldn't come back. She knew as much. Why, she thought, Why? I didn't do anyfing to yer Don don. I never did anything bad at all, well, I didn't mean to. Maybee 'e left cos I said I saw 'im cry in 'is room. Maybe. Im such a bad girl!
She tugged at her hair and let the tears stream down carelessly. Who cared who she was or what she said now? Who? Don had left her, why, even her own birth mother had got sick of her constant crying.
"Musn't think 'bout dat, Musn't, MUSN'T!" She screamed. She couldn't take it any longer. She ran like a demented cow, crashing right into the door. She was thrown out, thrown out into the cruelness of the street. Overwhelmed, she curled up into a ball by the old oak door, and slept soundly, slept away her fears and sadness, slept for Don, who was tired and weak and hungry, somewhere far away.



Hope you enjoyed it! I tried harder on that one, I think. Might add some later!


~ Straw

Last edited by StrawxBerrys; 04-18-2006 at 05:04 PM..
  #6  
Old 04-18-2006, 04:21 PM
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Just a lil BUMP to help you on yer way =)

~ Straw
  #7  
Old 04-19-2006, 02:51 PM
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Bump Me Baby One More Time! Woo! ;-) Still no comments?! I must have really done a bad story, or one so shocking none of you can talk =P.

- Straw
  #8  
Old 04-21-2006, 03:32 PM
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Wink

Ooh Daily Bump! Come on someone comment Next Bit is finally here, after days of not doing anything . Here goes...

That night was darker and more dangerous than any others. Pink, having suffered the shock of her much-loved gaurdian leaving, had slept all day in front of the old Pub. Many passers-by had penetrated Pink with their curious gazes, but finally lifted their heavy eyes off her, and broke into a run. Most of them thought she was a trap to lure them into the Pub where they would be robbed Penny-less.
"Poor child," murmered a certain Woman. Carefully, she observed Pink's looks and made a mental note, etched in her mind with invisible lead. And home she went, as all the others before her had done. Pink, unaware that she had been a major attraction, woke up somewhat around the evening.
"Mwooaahhhhrrrggg," A yawn escaped her. A yawn that was as cold a slap on her cheek. A yawn that woke her up to the life she had been living. She tried so hard to remember what had happened.
She had woke up. Crashed into the door in the hope of...and all went blank. She must have knocked herself out. She didn't know what happened. Suddenly, she shook with a violent scream. Only, this scream was silent, her imagination. A scream that froze her body. Looking up at the primrose sun, she could almost swear she saw his face smiling down, his radiant beams of laughter shining down onto the earth.
"Don," she whispered, so silent, so sad. She sat just there, staring up at the sun until her vision blurred. As sudden as death, she swiftly stood up, her body cramped and twisted from the uncomfortable time she'd had. Gathering up her very few belongings, she ran barefoot down the road, into the sunshine.

"Y'know, The 'Noo Guy Isnt Much Use Is 'e, now? Promised us 'ed 'elp 'n'all, Didn'e?," Sunday Asked, handing round some 'Baccy.
Midge-Pie Snatched one and lit it quickly, stuffing it in his wide mouth.
They all laughed at his sudden Actions. Don Sat slumped at the far end of the table, his face glowing a humilated Red.
Suddenly, he was nudged by Sunday.
"Yew, Lad, gotta do sum Work B'fore Toozdai, Or else the deals awf, Baby," this from Sunday.
Don scrambled off the chair and fell to his knees.
"Please, sir, Please. Ah'm Beggen' Yer, Sir," Came the choked Cry from Don.
Sunday shook with obvious mirth.
"Yeh, Yeh, Woteva. Beg me as moch As y'like, Yah Brainless Lazy Momma's Boy. See f'I'care," Sunday shrugged, but said this in a considerably queit tone. He did care. He had a secret soft spot for Don, but he knew that keeping him if he didn't work was impossible.
"Jist Earn Yer Keep, Woteva Yer Called," Meatball, a tough, stocky, well built man called out.
"Now its-a-time fer dinnah, If y'dont mind. Soup-'ead, you go mix your usual stuff. Soup, we know, donchwe, lads?," Declared Sunday.
They all nodded solemnly, then burst into laughter, falling off their chairs and into a wiggling heap in the middle of the room. Don couldn't help cheering up.
But then, in they came. Their Broad shoulders and lean sparkling eyes were positioned straight at the gang. And then, a smugglers' nightmare took place.

Hope you liked it!

~ Straw

Last edited by StrawxBerrys; 04-21-2006 at 03:56 PM..
  #9  
Old 04-22-2006, 10:04 AM
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Today's BUMP!!

~ Straw
  #10  
Old 04-22-2006, 10:07 AM
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good story, very long, !
  #11  
Old 04-22-2006, 10:10 AM
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I like it, its great, when its finished send it to a publisher!!!
it might get made into a classic!!

Jeena
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  #12  
Old 04-22-2006, 10:34 AM
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Oh My ¬_¬. Thanks so much! I shall try =). It might, who knows?! I appreciate your encouragement (SP?) alot . Yup, REALLY really long .

~ Straw
  #13  
Old 04-22-2006, 10:59 AM
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Wow thats awesome! It remids me of the Theif Lord book.But the Lady was a pro and your a kid arentcha ( lol I like how they talk) Good Job! I give it a 100/10
  #14  
Old 04-22-2006, 11:02 AM
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Aww Lol ! When you said that it was a writers' triumph! Lol I jumped all around the house singing 'Aha!'. That really lifted my spirits =P. Yup, Im a kid.

~ StrAHA!aw
  #15  
Old 04-23-2006, 09:20 AM
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Daily Bumpish .

~ Straw
 


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